Sunday, July 24, 2005
Where the mommies are
I am lifting my head out of the newborn/ new mom/ sleep deprivation fog every few moments more the last few days. It is like swimming underwater in a long lap lane at the pool and taking a breath of air in the "real world." Also all the time spent sitting feeding and rocking my baby gives my ever busy mind things to think about. One is about mommy-hood.
A lot of the pregnancy/ childcare/ ass-vice books tell you to seek out other new moms to bond with. I don't disagree at all with this, as in fact I see this blogging a way to reach out and "touch." I do find it challenging in the "world" I live in. I think because of the infertility issues, many of the people I have been close to are childless for one reason or another. I do have many friends that are my age (older mommy) that have babies and kids, but they are all so busy, busy taking care of the kids, working full time, and trying to keep their marriage together, etc. that we don't see each other much. One of my lifelines has been my bf here that juggles a busy OB/Gyn practice, 2 babies under 2, a stepdaughter in her teens, and her dh. Perhaps I am at this crossroads realizing I am transforming into one of these busy moms. If we were in the world of my childhood where all the mom's were stay at home and the neighborhood was full of fellow moms maybe I wouldn't feel like this. (My neighborhood is actually full of baby boomers who have empty nests...I think this may be more of a factor of the smallness of the population of my generation.)
Maybe I just think too much....after all I am not the first mother in the world. I can be, by nature very introverted and naturally have sequestered myself and baby and immediate family telling all visitors to stay away for a week more until I gather my wits (also doctor's suggestion for the health of baby and myself). True or not, I perceive visitors as friendly but way too inquisitive. Too many questions are often asked that I cannot answer. My response so far (even to just family members) is I don't know or I haven't decided yet.
It's the conundrum of the modern woman...so many choices, so many options, no right, no wrong, all right, all wrong? Just a clueless 1st time mom? In spite of my fog, the baby is doing remarkably well.
A lot of the pregnancy/ childcare/ ass-vice books tell you to seek out other new moms to bond with. I don't disagree at all with this, as in fact I see this blogging a way to reach out and "touch." I do find it challenging in the "world" I live in. I think because of the infertility issues, many of the people I have been close to are childless for one reason or another. I do have many friends that are my age (older mommy) that have babies and kids, but they are all so busy, busy taking care of the kids, working full time, and trying to keep their marriage together, etc. that we don't see each other much. One of my lifelines has been my bf here that juggles a busy OB/Gyn practice, 2 babies under 2, a stepdaughter in her teens, and her dh. Perhaps I am at this crossroads realizing I am transforming into one of these busy moms. If we were in the world of my childhood where all the mom's were stay at home and the neighborhood was full of fellow moms maybe I wouldn't feel like this. (My neighborhood is actually full of baby boomers who have empty nests...I think this may be more of a factor of the smallness of the population of my generation.)
Maybe I just think too much....after all I am not the first mother in the world. I can be, by nature very introverted and naturally have sequestered myself and baby and immediate family telling all visitors to stay away for a week more until I gather my wits (also doctor's suggestion for the health of baby and myself). True or not, I perceive visitors as friendly but way too inquisitive. Too many questions are often asked that I cannot answer. My response so far (even to just family members) is I don't know or I haven't decided yet.
It's the conundrum of the modern woman...so many choices, so many options, no right, no wrong, all right, all wrong? Just a clueless 1st time mom? In spite of my fog, the baby is doing remarkably well.
